Next to George is Nigel Hawthorne. Romeo is also the object of Hawthorne's affection, but that fact doesn't get in the way of his brain. He winces, shifting uncomfortably in his seat at the obvious slaughter of Shakespeare he is witnessing. Later, at the reception, he voices his opinion of the production, slamming the director as a buffoon. Coincidentally, the director happens to be standing in close proximity, and turns to Hawthorne and punches him in the nose.

The scene, in my mind, is crucial to the whole film. Not only is the scene littered with glib stereotypes, but Hawthorne's discomfort at having to sit through appalling theatre is deliciously ironic, since surely those of us in the cinema audience feels similar pain at having to sit through this film. Hawthorne's discomfort obviously stems from his boredom button, which lives in the base of every spine, and triggers squirming, cramps, and the inability to sit still. In children, the button fires regularly, in adults, it's more likely to act up during bad films. Mine screamed the whole way through "The Object of My Affection."

The story, for what it's worth, concerns a woman who is dating a man she doesn't like. When she discovers she is pregnant, she adopts her recently jilted gay buddy to act as father to the child. He accepts, then opts out when he gets a better offer.

The cast, almost all gathered from the small screen, may all be hoping to follow Helen Hunt's stunning conversion from sitcom to Oscar. There's Aniston from Friends, boyfriend John Pankow from Mad About You and jilting gay lover, Tim Daley from Wings. Nigel Hawthorne and Alan Alda have careers on both screens, of course, but their tv work in Yes Minister and Mash, respectively anchors them somewhat as tv actors.

So, like the characters in the film watching Shakespeare, you need to be fond of the cast members to really the "Object of my Affection." If not, you may find this to be a ridiculous collection of conveniences and stereotypes that only just hold together as a plot.